Love never fails,
It's this PROMISE I cling too.
It's my light in the dark,
My warmth in the rain.
It helps me hold on to hope,
In the midst of bitter pain.
Faith, hope, and love. These three remain.
Love never fails,
Though many times I do.
Yet when I keep trying,
Love always sees me through.
Love never fails,
I hope to always be,
In my actions and my words,
An act of love for thee.
Love never fails.
Your poem was simply amazing and inspiring. Reading it brought many emotions, thoughts and moments to mind for me. I wonder if you moved the single line after the first stanza to the end if that would make a nice finish to your poem. Thank you for sharing your poem with us!!
ReplyDeleteThat was beautiful! It is hard for me because, while I know we are supposed to make suggestions I just think that was beautiful and I wouldn't change a thing.
ReplyDeleteTrisha,
ReplyDeleteThe repeating line "love never fails" is great.
Keep reading this poem out loud and you may see some words to delete such as: in or it's. I don't think all of these simple words are needed. For example, the first stanza might go like this:
Love never fails,
A PROMISE to cling too.
light in the dark,
warmth in the rain.
holding on to hope,
In the midst of bitter pain.
But you are the poet/writer and you know what is best for your poem! I look forward to reading a finished version Trisha. Sincerely, deanna
Deanna you are so good at giving writing advice! I never see things that could improve it, but then I read what you think and I go, yep that's it!
ReplyDeleteTrisha- This poem is very powerful. You do a great job of conveying emotion. I like Allison's suggest as well of moving that one line down.
Trisha, I like your repetition of "Love never fails" in every stanza; the repetition not only gives a new beginning for each stanza but also connects every stanza to the overall theme. Also, I particularly like the metaphors used in first stanza!
Delete